An article in the Guardian (looming paywall) described Facebook’s business model as “surveillance capitalism”, a deliciously-succinct moniker, don’t you think?

Disclaimer: I’m no fan of social media. …if you’re one of those poor souls reflexively scrolling through countless feeds chock full of digital drivel all day long, stop reading now, because I can’t do anything for you – you’re hopelessly hooked – please seek professional help.

…to everyone else, please proceed! ;-)

The New Yorker (paywall) just published an opinion piece titled “Mark Zuckerberg’s Apology Tour”, touching on similar themes to the Guardian article; however I was particularly intrigued by the writer’s point regarding those Jekyll and Hyde-style claims emanating from Menlo Park for years…

Since its inception, Facebook has delivered two contradictory sales pitches. To the public, it insisted that it is not an editor or a gatekeeper but merely an open platform…Meanwhile, Facebook’s pitch to advertisers – any advertiser can deliver any message to any microsegment of the market.”

Agreed. Braying about how impartial or neutral your so-called “platform” is, and then pimping detailed demographic data harvested from your so-called “platform” is simply absurd. …and creepy. Definitely creepy.

Ms. Sandberg’s and Mr. Zuckerberg’s apparent fondness for compartmentalization strains credulity – I haven’t seen this level of mental masturbation, er, ummm, uh, I meant mental contortion, (…yeah, that’s it…), since the Clinton/Lewinsky dalliance!

Meanwhile, the Washington Post (paywall) portends a very public flogging when the Chief-Executive-Apologizer™ prostrates himself before Congress, and while most of what will pass for Zuckerberg’s obligatory testimony will be, in fact, little more than banal political theater, we might – emphasis on might – catch a glimpse of honest-to-goodness contrition. Heck, that’s almost an oxymoron – a contrite billionaire. :-)

“We can no longer go with the mantra ‘trust us’ because they have proven untrustworthy,” Blumenthal said about Facebook.

…don’t forget to #deletefacebook!

First, let’s dispense with the legalistic equivocating…

The claim that this is a data breach is completely false…no systems were infiltrated, and no passwords or sensitive pieces of information were stolen or hacked.

Yup, that little gem was extracted straight from Facebook’s news page on March 17th.

I beg to differ with the technocratic brain trust hunkered down in Menlo Park – splitting hairs over the definition of “breach” was a complete waste of time. However, I do like Merriam-Webster’s definition, particularly the first usage example, “a breach of trust”, because it sums up the situation perfectly.

C’mon, you do know Facebook has consistently exhibited a complete and utter disdain for the so-called “dumb f*cks”, (Mr. Zuckerberg’s words, not mine), who have chosen to surrender their digital lives to his stupid company, right?

As reported in the Guardian on Saturday, the Observer disclosed what whistleblower, Christopher Wylie, described as a concerted effort to harvest millions of Facebook profiles and then build psycho-graphic models of those people targeting what Wylie referred to as “…their inner demons.”

In the past several days, we’ve seen undercover footage of Alexander Nix, the now-suspended CEO of Cambridge Analytica, bragging about the absurd amount of influence his company had with the Trump campaign, claiming:

“We did all the research, all the data, all the analytics, all the targeting. We ran all the digital campaign, the television campaign and our data informed all the strategy.”

Sure, this sociopath from England can’t speak proper English, but setting that aside, the implications of what he was caught on camera/tape saying are chilling, to say the least.

OK, so let’s recap: heartless technologists – 1, crusading politicians – 0… :-(

Sticking with what’s being reported by the Guardian, let’s now turn to the Chief-Executive-Apologizer’s™ tardy, non-committal, half-baked attempt at accepting responsibility for the entire company being asleep at the wheel:

“I’m really sorry that this happened.”

Yeah, definitely fell on his sword with that one, huh? Oh, did I mention he apologized for the “breach of trust”? Yeah, said that too… So Facebook attorneys, security geeks and public relations ‘droids chafe at the use of “breach”, but a handful of days later, ole’ Marky-Mark says he’s sorry for said breach [of trust]. And according to the same Guardian article:

Facebook’s chief operating officer, Sheryl Sandberg, shared Zuckerberg’s post and added her own comment: “We know that this was a major violation of people’s trust, and I deeply regret that we didn’t do enough to deal with it.”

Oooh, impressive – way to lean in Sheryl, way to lean in…

E.J. Dionne Jr., Washington Post, (paywall), opinion writer, thinks we should be outraged about the Facebook/Cambridge Analytica scandal, noting:

Zuckerberg’s statement Wednesday afternoon acknowledging “mistakes” and pledging to “work through this” largely repeated what we already know. He’ll have to do much more.

Agreed. Much more… Much, much more…

I’ll leave you with what New York Times, (paywall), technology writer, Nellie Bowles, quoted in a story about a former colleague of mine who, on Wednesday, suggested it might be time to #deletefacebook:

Employees may feel the freedom to rebel because of Silicon Valley’s success, both technologically and financially. The technology platforms have become more powerful — and the fortunes much bigger — than the programmers ever expected. So while the industry’s power disturbs them, the wealth allows them to speak out without fear of retribution…

True, but let’s not overlook the simple fact these rather public displays of righteous indignation are invariably launched after the check clears! Said differently, while you’re shoveling billions into your pockets, you’ll put up with just about anything…

Aw, shucks, guess Sexie Rexie got the boot! ;-)

The New York Times reports Rex W. Tillerson’s employment as Secretary of State was abruptly terminated on Tuesday (paywall). Yeah, and the Thief-in-Chief™ did it in such a classy way too – again, from the Times:

Mr. Tillerson learned he had been fired on Tuesday morning when a top aide showed him a tweet…

The Washington Post headline reads “Trump Ousts Tillerson” (paywall), going on to confirm:

Steve Goldstein, undersecretary of state for public diplomacy and public affairs, said that Tillerson was “unaware of the reason” for his firing and had not spoken directly with Trump.

…and was promptly terminated for having told the truth instead of lying to the public! According to the Post:

…a top State Department spokesman [Goldstein] offered a different version of events — and was swiftly fired for contradicting the White House.

The Post goes on to say Mike Pompeo, Director of the CIA, is Trump’s choice as Tillerson’s replacement. So I guess the primary qualifier for pretty much any senior position in the White House is “likeability”… Again, from the Washington Post:

Pompeo long has been mentioned as Tillerson’s most likely replacement. As CIA director, the former Republican lawmaker from Kansas developed a warm relationship with Trump, often delivering the President’s Daily Brief to Trump in person and racing over to the West Wing at a moment’s notice to field the president’s queries on a range of topics.

Wow, Pompeo sounds like a boot-licking sycophant! Sad. The so-called “adult quotient” in the White House continues to decline – who’s next?

…another one bites the dust. Hope Hicks, abruptly resigned on Tuesday, as reported in the Washington Post (paywall). Yeah, apparently the Cheeto-in-Chief™ wasn’t too thrilled about her testimony before a House intelligence panel on Tuesday, let her know it, and she bailed. According to the same article in the Washington Post:

“Hicks acknowledged to the House intelligence panel Tuesday that she has occasionally told “white lies” for Trump, according to a person familiar with the testimony.”

Uh, yeah, so who doesn’t lie in that place? The Post goes on to say:

“…Hicks had been increasingly feeling the stress of the position, especially in the wake of revelations about her relationship with former staff secretary Rob Porter.”

JFC, so a 29 year-old, former model gets caught sleeping with a wife-beater while cowering in the shadows for the better part of 13 months playing nurse-maid to Dummy Donny, then tries a half-ass claim of executive privilege?!

Yup, definitely time to go “…pursue other opportunities.” I’d say it’s Hope-less too…