Why on earth did James Comey decide to send this letter last week?

…pressure from fellow Republicans?
…disgruntled underlings threatening to leak juicy details?
…promises of an awesome bl*wie from Melania Trump?

Oooh, it seems “…the FBI has learned of the existence of emails that appear to be pertinent…” to the once-closed, and now apparently re-opened investigation into how Hillary R. Clinton handled, (or didn’t handle), classified information passing through her personal email server.

…and who do we have to thank for this late-binding cluster f*ck that will undoubtedly inject even more uncertainty into the 2016 election cycle? None other than Anthony J. Weiner, a.k.a. “Mr. Dick Pic[ture]” himself!

Yeah, seems he might have been texting images of his throbbing member to some teenage girl – yikes! Enter the FBI. So they snatch his laptop to conduct a forensic investigation and presto, bango, we’ve got more Hillary R. Clinton emails to wade through. Why? This prick was sharing a laptop with his wife. Oh yeah, it gets waaaaay better… Yes, Mr. Weiner happens to be married. …married to whom? None other than Huma Mahmood Abedin, advisor to Hillary J. Clinton. I swear to God, this f*cking email scandal is a Gordian Knot – it ain’t never gonna go away…

You know what I think? I think Weiner is a huge dick! …too bad Abedin didn’t divorce this scumbag a million years ago – would’ve saved us all a lot of heartache between now and November 8th.

Comey, (a.k.a. the bloviating doofus), earns his first :‑& :‑& :‑& rating.